His decade-long absence from the country music charts notwithstanding, friend of Country California and ’90s hitmaker David Kersh reports that he is still as busy as ever.
These days, his mornings start well before the rooster crows, as the bundled stacks drop from the delivery truck and hit the sidewalk in front of his house before 5am. By 5:20, Kersh has the papers rolled and packed into the canvas bag secured to the handlebars of his 10-speed Schwinn Continental. He straps on his helmet and pedals hard, trying to get the bulk of his deliveries made before 6am, when ordinary civilians begin rolling out of bed and checking their porches.
According to Kersh, the lifestyle does not come without its hazards:
“It’s still dark and cold when I go out, so I have to bundle up a bit, which restricts my range of motion. That makes it a little harder to throw the papers where they need to go, and some people get real pissy when you accidentally land one in their flowers or bang one against their front door. They even withhold tips because of it. A few times, I’ve gotten distracted by trying to aim my pitch and accidentally run into parked cars and telephone poles. Also, there aren’t really any benefits or anything, and some people sort of frown on a 38-year-old paperboy. But I like the work; it keeps me young.”
Asked what it’s like to have a former country music star in his employ, Kersh’s boss, route coordinator Mitch Higgins, remarked: “That guy used to sing? Honestly, I couldn’t tell you much about him. He’s done an okay job, but we found a kid who’ll do the same for less, so we’re thinking of dropping David from our roster. I hope he has a Plan C.”
Concept by Farce the Music