Country California

Country music. Seriously.

Lengthy, Argumentative Comment Thread Brought to Satisfying Conclusion

A needlessly confrontational, obnoxiously pedantic discussion thread on a country music blog took a sudden turn at the 134th comment today, resolving quickly and amicably to the satisfaction of all parties involved.

“Obviously, it was just a fundamental disagreement,” said Owen J., who initiated the controversy by comparing a new song few have heard with an older one most normal people don’t remember. Another commenter, Gary, questioned the accuracy of that comparison, then the two spent several hours clarifying the exact nature of their disagreement, casually hurling personal insults and failing to change each other’s minds.

“Somewhere around the fourteenth facepalm and twentieth instance of the one guy picking apart the other’s grammar in an effort to seem superior, I started to doubt it would ever turn around,” said Keith D., one of many site visitors who watched with a mix of bewilderment and disgust as the exchange unfolded.

Then, as quickly as it had flared up, the quarrel dissipated, with both parties abruptly agreeing that the original point of contention had, after all, been rather moot, and what should it matter if two people on opposite sides of the country hold differing opinions on a matter of relatively little concern to either of them?

“Sure, I feel a little silly for getting sucked into it,” said Gary of the discussion he kept loaded in a hidden tab throughout the second half of his work day, firing off quips and insults whenever all coworkers and managers were out of viewing range of his computer screen. “But in the end, I believe it was a productive use of my time.”

“Because,” he concluded thoughtfully, “the final outcome was that I made a new friend today.”

Find more satirical articles in the Fake News archive.

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  1. Oh, this NEVER happens.

  2. For the most part, there might’ve been a rare case here and there, this never happens

  3. This may be “fake news” but insufferable peeps on comment threads are a real problem at for instance the9513. I have boycotted that site because it lets Megadouche Jon Weisberger spew his obnoxiousness nonstop. It was no longer fun reading comments that got derailed by that guy’s mean-spirited agenda. He would constantly pick fights with people like Stormy who obviously couldn’t fight back. It was so meanspirited; it was pure bullying, like a 9th grader beating up on a 3rd grader. That guy seemed more interested in mocking people for not knowing as much about country music as he knows than he is in teaching them some of his knowledge. I don’t know why that site allowed/allows him to be so hateful and destructive. I really miss the 9513 but I can’t support a website that allows its members to be so meanspirited to each other.


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