Country California

Jessica Simpson’s publicist recently quibbled with rumors that the singer had been ‘dropped’ from Sony Nashville, pointing out that Simpson had never actually been on the label: “Jessica is and has always been an Epic artist. She was on loan to Sony Nashville for her country album.”

Many expressed confusion at the widely-circulated statement, as Simpson had been promoted as a Sony Nashville artist throughout her foray into the country format.

Since Country California is devoted to being the web’s premier source of breaking Jessica Simpson news, we contacted Epic for clarification regarding the label’s future plans for the singer and received the following exclusive statement:

“Although it is unfortunate that Jessica Simpson’s stint on Sony Nashville did not work out as planned, we believe we have found a new opportunity for her that is equally as exciting. For some period of time (constituting no more than the remainder of her life), Jess will be “on loan” to the food service industry. She is currently working with a local Hardee’s, but we expect we might have to find her a new placement when her supervisors discover that she fashioned her uniform top into a bustier and has been informing drive-thru customers of her flatulence problems for the past several hours. Regardless, Epic looks forward to continuing to work with Simpson in whatever capacity necessary to keep most people from knowing that she’s associated with us.”

Simpson was unavailable for comment, but will hopefully call us when her shift ends at 5.