Garth Brooks Music Coming to iTunes

  

Having finally struck a deal to make the music of The Beatles available to its online consumers, iTunes today announced the addition of another longtime digital holdout. “We’re excited to announce that the entire catalog of Garth Brooks will be available on iTunes beginning next week,” said Apple CEO ‘Cowboy’ Steve Jobs.

Brooks, who had previously gone on record as saying that iTunes was “killing music,” was forced to reconsider when a Taylor Swift song he really, really wanted to hear was made available exclusively through the online service. “I guess maybe it isn’t so bad,” offered the portly superstar, bobbing his head to a live acoustic version of “Sparks Fly.”

Still, most of Garth’s objections to a la carte downloading, inflexible pricing, and digital distribution remain, so the singer has established some safeguards to protect his interests as he enters the wild unknown of online music. As with Brooks’ Vegas concerts, stringent guidelines have been put in place to ensure equal access to the new catalog additions and prevent scalping of his songs.

1. Those interested in purchasing Garth Brooks music on iTunes must meet at the corner of 14th Avenue and Jefferson Street in Poughkeepsie, New York, between the hours of 2pm and 3pm on Wednesday, November 24.

2. If you mispronounce Poughkeepsie, you will be immediately sent home.

3. Remaining prospective consumers will be led to an undisclosed location set up as a computer lab, where a specially branded version of the iTunes program will already be open and displayed on each screen.

4. Prospective consumers must enter their full name, phone number, mailing address, Social Security number, and various other personal information in the corresponding fields and tick the checkbox asserting “I agree that I will not let anyone else hear my purchased copies of this music or utter the name ‘Garth Brooks’ in conversation without prior written approval from Mr. Brooks or his legal representatives.”

5. Having registered your intent to purchase, you will be placed in a holding cell for up to 72 hours while Brooks’ team runs exhaustive background checks, including talking to your old high school flames and thoroughly investigating any clubs or associations (e.g. AHBA) to which you have ever belonged.

6. If approved, you will be able to claim one (1) set of earbuds and proceed to a different computer lab, where you will be allowed to enter your credit card information and purchase any tracks you desire for $1.50 apiece. Note that these tracks may only be downloaded once, to the lab computer. You may not burn or transfer them, and you agree to have your credit card charged again, possibly repeatedly, should Garth ever be running low on jet fuel.

“I’m trying to make this as easy as possible for fans while still making it worth my while. There are a couple hoops to jump through, but only because I need to be absolutely sure that I won’t lose a penny on this deal,” said the singer, whose albums can alternately be had for $2 apiece at virtually all used record stores nationwide.

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Comments

    • says

      Dont use i tunes. I like buying the entire album and package for my collection. Don’t seem to bother the Garth fans much at all that he dont do i tunes seeing that he sold out 9 shows (140,000 tickets) in 3 hoours a few weeks ago.

  1. says

    I almost fell for this one! I was about to email the announcement to my brother. Had I stopped reading just before the bit about rules for buying, I would have made a fool out of myself.

    Funny post!

  2. Richard says

    Garth is an incredible songwriter and entertainer. Even more important than that Garth is a great person who does a lot to help the less fortunate and through his foundation does alot to help kids. I have bought everyone of his albums and without question it is the worth every penny. Garth owns his music and has every right to protect it. I have also been to see Garth at the Wynn in Vegas 3 times and have seen him do numerous arena concerts. He is without question the most talented musician I have ever seen.

  3. says

    Read the headline and thought, finally, but alas, ua got me, still ya got to respect Garth, hes always been about the albums and not the singles, even when he first came out.

  4. says

    “… Garth is a great person who does a lot to help the less fortunate and through his foundation does alot to help kids …”

    Which, of course, excuses all his crazy-ass ‘career moves’ like multiple retirements and more repackaging of the same hits than even Mike Curb would dream of. I am usually the first to defend Garth Brooks for all he’s done for country music – I don’t even ascribe to the thinking that he was in any way a detriment – but that he’s also a decent human being isn’t a defense for any of those choices.

    On a related note, I am looking forward to the Garth-Available-on-iTunes commercial that will go with his inevitable bow to digital music sales. That Beatles ad is pretty neat.

  5. says

    In all fairness, I don’t think that any of those career decisions really need much defending. They’re not exactly earth shattering. He wouldn’t be the first to try to retire and not be able to do it; if somebody doesn’t want to buy the third GH package, he/she doesn’t have to do it; and not releasing digitally is quirky, but easily overcome by buying used or new copies and ripping them to iTunes.

  6. Kennith says

    I don’t understand why Brooks won’t realease his songs, is he too stupid to know he can make more money? Shrink that giant ego Garth and think about your fans. Most of us don’t even buy CD’s anymore.

  7. Hunter says

    F***ing stupid, Garth is a great musician. But it’s a total cop out to not release your shit on the most covinient place to buy anyone’s f**kin music. he’s an attion hungry man living in self gratification.

  8. Kimberely Corder says

    This would be phenomenal I love Garth and the songs I intend to purchase were some that never made big on the billboard charts but I love none the less I love all his music and even if I had to purchase the albums in their entirety I would as well I would just like to be able to purchase them on my I phone & download them as well! Love Garth

  9. says

    garth lost any money i would have spent. wanted to hear a song. being nostalgic and nothing on itunes. well its a digital would. he can do anything he wants but if u inconvienience just one fan. ur a douche. ur rich cause we like u and ur lucky u got the chance.

  10. Leslie says

    For whatever reasons Garth has for not allowing his music to be purchased on I-Tunes I respect the decision, But I also agree that his fans who have supported his career and continue to….would really appreciate being able to have the convenience in this crazy world to download his music…music is one of the core ” mental and emotional getaways” for many who have hectic lives with work and family, etc…. Please consider…. It will be greatly appreciated by your loyal continued fans!

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