Obama, Romney Spend Final Debate on Merits of New Taylor Swift Album

Obama and Romney listen with interest as Schieffer explains his reading of "We Are Never, Ever Getting Back Together."

When frantic eleventh-hour phone calls revealed that a scheduling snafu had pitted the third presidential debate against another major national event, Barack Obama and Mitt Romney agreed to nix the planned foreign affairs focus and devote the evening's discussion to what would really be on America's mind on October 22. "This final presidential debate will focus on Taylor Swift, whose new album Red came out just this morning," moderator Bob Schieffer explained at the top of last night's … [Read more...]

Taylor Swift Surprise Face Added to Mount Rushmore

Taylor Swift on Mt. Rushmore

Mount Rushmore is getting a major Swift-centric upgrade, revealed representatives for the National Park Service and Big Machine Records in a joint announcement Monday morning. "Given that the average American can't exactly tell George Washington and Thomas Jefferson apart anyway, we felt that there wouldn't be much lost in replacing one of them with something a little more contemporary," said Park Service spokesperson Jeff Whittaker, confessing that he himself could not say for sure whether … [Read more...]

Lonestar: “Did We Mention We’re Back Together?”

Lonestar image

After four years apart, the members of pop-country group Lonestar have finally reunited with original lead singer Richie McDonald to mark their 20th anniversary in the music business. "While we had a great run with [replacement vocalist] Cody Collins, we know fans are thrilled and chomping at the bit to get new music from the original line-up," says dimpled keyboardist Dean Sams. "Everywhere we go, people are asking 'Who is Lonestar?' and 'Why are you old guys wearing pleather pants?' So, … [Read more...]

LeAnn Rimes Not Photographed Wearing Bikini

Non-bikini picture of LeAnn Rimes

A source inside the LeAnn Rimes camp has revealed the tragic details of a recent beach outing with husband Eddie Cibrian during which the sculpted and manicured Rimes wore a brand new white Michael Kors Speed Clip Bikini without any photographic documentation whatsoever. "It was chaotic to say the least," said our source. "First, two of the photographers we tipped off came down with strep throat. How does that happen? Anyway, the TMZ guy got into a fender bender with Amanda Bynes and couldn't … [Read more...]

Sugarland Puts New Tour “In the Hands of the Fans”

Sugarland

Reigning CMA and ACM Vocal Duo of the Year Sugarland will launch a new headlining tour entitled “IN THE HANDS OF THE FANS” this April. Besides relying on fan interaction to determine the set list played in each city, the tour will also include fans in other, more innovative ways. “This year's tour is based around the concept of putting the show into the hands of the fans,” begins Jennifer Nettles. “THEY will make the requests that will help form the set list and guide the show. Through … [Read more...]

Some Guy You’ve Never Heard of Makes Opry Debut

anonymous singer

Some country singer you have never heard of, much less heard any music from, makes his Opry debut Friday night. Hailing from a fond-memory-inducing podunk on the Kentucky horizon, the random male country performer reportedly grew up listening to the Opry on the radio. He also visited the Opry several times, and idolized quite a few artists who graced that stage. He also wears a cowboy hat and customized leather belts. Whoever this guy is released his debut single in late December and has … [Read more...]

Brantley Gilbert Fan to Graduate High School

Brantley Gilbert CDC

Brantley Gilbert fan Nat Barksdale of Covington, Georgia, recently announced that he will graduate high school this spring, making him the first Gilbert fan to do so without the aid of post-dropout GED courses. "My counselor says it looks like I'm going to scrape by in driver's ed and welding class and finally graduate!" said an elated Nathaniel, who will gain his 22nd credit, making him graduation-ready after six years of studious classwork. "It's been a struggle," he admitted, "but thanks … [Read more...]